For your entertainment pleasure...

-It you're looking for a new flavor of country to wet your whistle this summer, I highly recommend 'The Foundation" by Zac Brown Band. Especially their new song "Toes". Definitely something to take your mind off the summer grind, a la "Some Beach" by Blake Shelton, check em out.

More to come today...

Thank You Holy Favre!

-So finally, we get the report that first ballot HOF'er/Gunslinger/High School loving quarterback Brett Farve has finally decided to stay retired and not persue a shot as the signal caller for the Minnesota Vikings, and only two words can sum up what I think...

Thanks God.

It was bad enough that Favre turned himself into a walking novelty last season when he decided to (eh hem...) come out of retirement and join the New York Jets. Throwing 22 picks to go along with 22 TDs and be granted the clerical error of election to the Pro Bowl for the AFC (Matt Cassell, anyone?) If he were to come back, the man who has thrown the most interceptions and been sacked more than any active player at his time of retirement would have further damaged his reputation of being a rugged, southern, gunslinger with a pechant for forgetting plays and improvising with nerves of steel. Though I always thought that whiskey played some sort of part in it.

Now all things are in place. Brett Favre can cut grass, the Vikes can go about signing Michael Vick and watch to Brad Childress and his mustache travel the world and solve crimes.

On the brightside, some is about to get very rich...and possibly very arrested for fraud.

But hey, it's not like we haven't seen this before, with better special effects.

The Dog Days Are Upon Us

-Right after the MLB All-Star Game, before the start of NFL Training Camp, these are what we in the biz commonly refer to as the 'Dog Days of Sports'.

I can't tell you how much I hate these days. Like Lindsey Lohan hates rehab. Like Matthew McConaughey hates Right Guard. It's terrible, nothing really to write about, nothing going on to write about, nothing to even think to write about.

So it's hard to even find the want inside me to blog, but I believe that adversity proves character, rather than defines it, so the best thing to do it talke about the problem.

It's the time of the year that makes you try and do other things. I'm an avid fisher (by hobby) and golfer (by trade), but those can only take me so far. So what now? Knitting, no (not great with sharp things, it's hereditary). Reading, maybe (Does ESPN.com count?). Henna tats? Not that much of a hippie.

So tell me folks, what do you do during the Dog Days? And keep your minds out of the gutter, I like to think of this and a PG-13 show.

Just so people know...

So, apparently, the lil women wasn't happy about my foray into using Marissa Miller on my Cubs post (some people just can't appreciate works of art, I tell you). But anyway, per her giving me the silent treatment. I love her. She's my women. She's Rachael, check her out at...http://rachaelpostgrad.blogspot.com/.


Now, back to our regularly scheduled program...

The Cubs Stigma

-Cubs fans. Know them, love them, loathe them. Pick your poison.

It's always been easy for me to see what makes a person a Cubs fan, they are the lovable losers. The bridesmaids, the Pippen to Jordan, the AFC Title to the Super Bowl. Always close enough to root for, but never quite good enough.

So the story goes, everyone knows the curses. The black cat, the billy goat, Bartman. All their losing goes back to something that transcends sports. In a tight situation, it always seems to be something completely unrelated to the actual game that keeps them from getting to the next level. Like the Red Sox until circa 2004.

I know real Cubs fans. Those fans see all that as a joke. They know they are the lovable loser, they can't help it. They know that it all comes down to the game. That even if Alou catches the ball and Bartman stays in his seat, they still have two outs to get and a great Marlins squad that won the World Series to beat. That a billy goat and his owner have zero effect on balls and strikes. That God doesn't hate them for bleeding blue and white.

Even those that want to believe it say it with a touch of sarcasm. As my friend K.P. says it (best): "I know I shouldn't blame it on Bartman. But I do."

Then there are the fake Cubs fans. The ones that truly believe all the BS is true. God hates them, the world is designed against them. It's all a conspiracy. Those are the ones I frequently laugh at. They deserve it.

I've ventured to Chicago many a time. I find the city great, and, even with the White Sox winning a World Series three years ago, more and more Cubs fans everytime I go. But what else is it? No one can love a team for losing so bad right? It defies convention. No one is supposed to love a loser!!!! Is it the friendly confines of Wrigley Field? The beer? The fact that Boystown on N. Halsted provides entertainment outside the stadium?

But they do, and maybe that's what bring on more and more faithful to the Giant C. Other recognize the allegiance and decide to follow. Much like Red Sox Nation.

I guess, but it doesn't make them any better. Nor will it make that Word Series championship banner appear after 101 years of absence.

I guess their fanbase is the truest essence of the old addage that has been made famous by struggling squads and politicians...Wait 'Til Next Year.

Until then, fans of the Cubs, take solace that Marissa Miller has also worn a Cubs jersey. Much like Sandberg, Banks and Sosa (well...). Only wears it better.

An amazing development in the NBA

-ESPN.com reports that the Toronto Raptor's traded sharpshooter Jason Kapono to the Philadelaphia 76ers for Reggie Evans. An amazing one-player trade. Something of a dying art these days in the world of professional sports.

Every trade that seems to happen these days includes multiple players and cash, cows, oil fields and the kitchen sink. It's like a game of "How Much Can We Move Out?"

One player trades are a something you don't see everyday, with no strings attached.

One of the fairest comparison comes from Will Ferrell in Semi-Pro when his ABA team traded a washing machine to the Kentucky Colonels for Woody Harrelson. We laughed, but hey a kid got traded for maple bats a few years ago, and in the end, unfortunately, the bats got the better end of the deal.

Take pride Jason and Reggie, your part of a dying breed. Well maybe not you so much, Evans, have fun in the cold, eventually it'll numb that losing feeling.

When refs get too much credit

-So, I'm watching the NBA Finals tonight. I'm not usually an NBA fan (Clay Bennett ripped out my soul and poured Epsom in the wounds) but at least I can enjoy some hint of defense not normally seen in the League, and it's an added bonus that Allen Iverson is currently playing as many minutes as I am. Plus, being a future Western Kentucky University alumnus, I love watching former WKU guard Courtney Lee play while Adam Morrison and his porn-stache enjoy the view from the bench in a suit as cheap as his haircut.

But I'm watching, and about midway through the third quarter L.A.'s Lamar Odom goes for a loose ball with Orlando's Jameer Nelson and Marcin Gortat, subsquently Odom decided to be R. Kelly at a middle school dance and lay them both on the hardwood, pulling them to the ground. When the dust settled, Odom was called for a loose-ball foul.

ABC Play-by-Play guy and world-renowned coaching failure Doug Collins then enlightened all of us in T.V. land with his refereeing expertise. Saying the foul call was a "great call."

At that point, I reached Nirvana. Thanks Dougie.

Great call. What the hell actually constitutes a great call? The ref perfectly pointed at the player committing the infraction? His shirt was neatly pressed? He earned his paycheck? Honestly, no call in the NBA is a great call. Especially in the NBA Finals, the best refs were chosen for this gig, it's their job.

A great call would be actually calling a foul on LeBron when he fullbacks a 6'0", 175 lb. point guard while driving through the lane. Or NOT calling anything in the final five seconds of a one-point game unless someone bleeds. Right call or wrong call, period.

Monty Loves to Zee De Silly Americawns Vin

-It's time for quotes from golf's favorite idiot savant, Colin Montgomerie.

The European Tour makes a stop this weekend at Celtic Manor in southern Wales, the site of the 2010 Ryder Cup, where the Europeans will try to redeem themselves after their shameful, demoralizing, completely worthy loss to the United States at last year's Ryder Cup at Valhalla.

The scene itself just begged for a verbal haymaker like a fat kid begs for one more piece of cake. And Monty, whose remarks have made more history than his game, just slapped a big grin on golf writers everywhere.

Montgomerie, the captain of the Europeans for next years festivities, was asked about the U.S. win in last year's Ryder Cup, just gave them a year-and-a-half early piece of billboard material:

"It's great that (2008 Ryder Cup captain Paul) Azinger got the Americans to finally play like the Europeans."

I thought about filing this in "Irrelevent Irrelevance", being that on the PGA Tour (and in any tournament that actually matters) that is exactly what Montgomerie's career has amounted too. But hey, the guy tried.

Then, as if a good ole Scottish ribbing wasn't enough fun, he asked that he not be paired with 2010 U.S. Ryder Cup captain Corey Pavin, probably to take away from any "El Capitan v. El Capitan" drama. Gotta love the guy, always thinking of (or pissing at) others.

Oh, silly ole Monty, you always know how to make us smile. Just can't stay mad at ya.

Irrelevant Irrelevance

-Bringing back the ole' segment with thoughts from my twisted mind...Good point brought up by PTI's Michael Wilbon during one of those we're-on-T.V.-but-we're-not-on-T.V.-moments they've started doing:

NBA Hall of Famer and recent PGA-conquerer Jerry West was nicknamed "Mr.Clutch" in his playing days. As an individual, the guy had more clutch than NASCAR. You needed a big shot, an important rebound or free-throw, floppy brown hair? He had it for you. He earned it. He IS the NBA's freakin' logo, after all.

But for all his individual, seemingly unlimited supply of clutch, West was a member of eight different Los Angeles Lakers teams that played in the NBA Finals. Number of titles? One. Uno. Not even a miracle could help West win more.

West is undoubtly one of the greatest players in the history of basketball, but if he were to have played in this generation, where winning makes the world go 'round (just ask Cleveland's economy), would he still carry the same moniker?

When all else fails, plead ignorance...

-That's the angle the University of Memphis is taking when it comes to the allegations that they knowingly allowed (reportedly) one-year wonder guard Derrick Rose to enroll at the school after not only changing grades on his transcript to temporarily make him eligible for admission, but then having someone else take his SATs.

From the University's statement on the matter:

"The University does not have sufficient information to conclude that (redacted) engaged in unethical conduct in regard to a (redacted) taking of the Scholastic Aptitude Test (SAT). Specifically, the University has no knowledge that (redacted) did not complete the SAT entrance examination. Accordingly, the University does not know whether the information included in the allegation is substantially correct and is unable to conclude whether a violation of the cited NCAA regulations has occurred."

The school said after conducting it's own investigation, it found no proof of any tampering or academic fraud. Sure, just like Reggie Bush and O.J. Mayo didn't get any special treatment at USC. We all know that these one-year and two-year athletes are in college to get their degrees.

I guess the student managers are the ones who made all these moves behind Calipari and Co.'s back. So many people are starting to deny any knowledge of this whole situation, it's starting to make the Federal Government look truthful.

The media is running away with this one. ESPN has reported it three times in the last hour and a half and the online media are making this seem like no one has ever denied any wrongdoing like this in the history of college sports.

This event in itself puts Memphis against a wall. By pleading that they knew nothing, it looks as if the coaches and other staff at Memphis are simply incompetent and have zero control over their own program. If they agree that they knew, they look the way the NCAA wants them to look, like cheaters.

It's been awhile since the NCAA has been able to nail a program to the wall, I have a feeling this is one of those times where they really try to end their dry spell.

What makes the plot even thicker, a story on the matter in the Chicago Sun-Times quotes Illinois athletic director Ron Guenther as saying that the Illini knew full well about Derrick Rose's situation while recruiting him in 2007.

Ah, the college basketball off-season. What would it be without denial, rumors and a little bit of intentional confusion.

God, if you grant me one wish this year...

-Erin Andrews doesn't want to be a sideline reporter...SHE WANTS TO DANCE!!!

The beautiful, blonde bombshell of ESPN that is the hope of all bloggers and general (ahem) sports geeks everywhere reportedly wants to be a contestant on ABC's "Dancing with the Stars".

The former member of the University of Florida Dazzlers dance team, she isn't shy about her desire to do it either.

"I love the show, and I grew up around dancing," the lovely Sideline Queen told the Chicago Sun-Times."I think I would be in the top, unless I fall, I'm a big faller."

Oh Erin, even if you were to fall, I'm not sure anyone would even have the heart to eliminate you. And with the heels she sports on gamedays, balance can't be too much of a problem.

My only hope is for her to be graceful and light of foot. Or for a wardrobe malfunction. You know, either one would suffice.

Hey, if the Big Guy Upstairs can grant all those idiots who loved the name of Mine That Bird their wish, why can't he grant mine?

Brandon Marshall, Pacman reincarnate?

-Just saw the ESPN story on Denver Broncos' wide receiver Brandon Marshall and his seven--count them, seven--counts of domestic abuse. In an interview with Bob Ley, when asked what do the abuse accusations say about him, he attempted to dodge the question by brown-nosing the NFL and lightly admitting that "it's a problem".

NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell gave Marshall a 4-game suspension for violating the league's personal conduct policy last season, and for a player with the talent of Marshall, this is disappointing to see.

Though he has never actually been responsible for a shooting or a mass brawl, Marshall is starting to look a lot like former Titan/Cowboy/current NFL bad boy Adam "Pacman" Jones. He seems to feel as if he is above the league and maybe a longer suspension will be something that may be in order to set him straight. He's only going into his fourth season in the league, so if he reforms now, he can save a promising career, but as of now, he bares a striking resemblance to the career of Jones, who started early in his career with the criminal extracurriculars and has subsequently been black-balled by the NFL and it's teams. If Marshall isn't careful, he could end up like Jones.

No team wants to take a chance on a P.R. nightmare in a time when the commissioner can be a bit suspension/fine happy at times.

Like Pacman, Marshall has never been a locker room distraction so much to the team, but more just a hazard to himself.

Marshall will be playing under a young coach in Josh McDaniels starting this season and maybe playing under a coach who is closer and more relateable to himself will help him rehabilitate, it'll be interesting to see how he adjusts.

Thoughts?

Something to chew on...

-So now the word is that newly-annointed Kentucky head coach John Calipari's former staff at Memphis is under investigation by the NCAA for major violations with the academics of a player from their 2007-08 squad. Sources say it's Derrick Rose and has to do with possible shoty SAT scores...Not like the kid needed to go to class anyway.

The Memphis Commercial-Appeal reports that Cal's name is not in the report and Kentucky said they knew about the allegations, which came to light on January 16. He has also been asked to appear at the hearing by the NCAA on June 6.

Seems a lot like his situation at UMass in the 90's when the Minutemen were forced to vacate their 1996 Final Four appearance after improper benefits were paid to players, most notably Marcus Camby. Calipari was cleared of any wrong-doing.

Not a great two days for Calipari. First, he loses four players to transfer, neglect or just flat quitting (though most UK fans would tell you that isn't a problem), now this. The road to success is (ahem) bumpy.

If UK knew about the allegations beforehand, then they know exactly what they were getting, so any future trouble with Calipari and the Big Blue program can't be blamed by the university on being naive. But it will be interesting to see how something like this affects the fanbase and what road they see their program going down.

Thoughts?

New Era, Lost Tradition

-Tradition is something that fans of Kentucky men's basketball have come to inherit, something that has stood the test of time and coaching changes. No matter who took the reigns, Kentucky was always had a coach who both respected the tradition of the proud program and also wanted to do everything in their power to further it.

New UK coach John Calipari's move today makes me wonder whether he is that coach.

Calipari has basically given walk-on guard Landon Slone the silent treatment according to reports by Brett Dawson of the Courier-Journal, which in turn, has been Slone's indicator that he is not welcome in the hallowed halls of Rupp next season.

While this situation may play itself out in the next few days, it seems like this is something that the fans of Big Blue Nation are sorrowly overlooking.

Richie Farmer, Brandon Stockton, John Pelphrey, all players from rural Kentucky counties who have played for the Big Blue. It's been the roots for the fanbase, they are players the common fan can relate too. Granted yes, these are all former Mr. Basketball winner in the state, but the concept is still the same.

Slone played sparing minutes last season for Billy Gillespie. In those minutes, he proved his worth. The kid bleeds blue, he's always been a Wildcat fan, and would gladly sit the bench for three more seasons if that means success for the Cats, just being able to practice and play for UK is enough for him.

But according to Slone, he was ignored by Calipari and instead talked to an assistant coach who told him that Calipari's teams feature a total of two walk-ons in his nine seasons at Memphis (and one was last season, J.J. Henry, who was used to lure his younger brother and top-10 2009 prospect, Xavier, to Memphis. Xavier signed with Kansas after de-commiting for Calipari when he left for UK).

As a lifelong Kentuckian and someone who has seen the devotion to the program that I have seen over the years, the fact that UK fans are not at all upset about this confuses me and gets me to thinking that the rose-colored glasses are fitting a little too tight to their collective faces. Yes, this is a new era of UK basketball. Calipari has the best recruiting class possibly ever coming to UK, he has support, charisma, more money that most second-world country's annual budgets and a reputation of winning as of late. But all that has made for a possible loss of tradition that could be imminent.

It's not a crime to let Slone go. But it could be the first step in UK losing the tradition it has held on to for so long. Kentucky graduates players, Cal's teams at Memphis routinely graduated less that 10%. UK keeps a clean program (excluding the Eddie Sutton years), the 1996 Calipari-coached UMass team was forced to vacate it's Final Four appearance after players received improper benefits.

People can change, Calipari may do so. Maybe the new coach comes in and not only reforms the teams ways on the court, but also reforms his reputation off it.

But something that doesn't need reformation is the proud Kentucky traditions, and they must hope that Slone's cold-shoulder treatment isn't the first step to that.

Calpari Makin' Moves

-It's another day in the neighborhood of UK hoops and new coach John Calipari has pulled yet another ripe fruit from the recruiting tree and nabbed John Wall, a top-5 player in the nation and his third top-15 recruit of the offseason.

No doubt the guy has proven he is able to compete on the biggest stage off the court, now it's a matter of time before he can prove that all this talent will bring on the court success. It's been an amazing about-face for the UK faithful in the past three months. Going from the firing of Billy Gillespie to the hiring of Cal to the pristine class he is bringing in. I wouldn't be surprised if a few fans showed up at hospitals for treatment from being delirious.

Bottom line, the guy is single-handedly resurrecting the Kentucky name all over the place, and he's the right man for the job. Talent-wise, the team is Final Four-calibur, and outside of Wall's misdemeanor breaking and entering charge, none of the players seem to be getting into trouble. But as of now, Wall is the final piece to a 2009-2010 squad that should be top-10.

Now the question will be if they can play.

I'm Back

No fear folks. I'm back after a long hiatus with the College Heights Herald owning my life. I'll be posting soon. Also, check out my twitter page, Twitter name: otbthinker

Irrelevant Irrelevance

Just another example of how most MLB players, current and former, are handling the rampant steroids accusations that I'm pretty sure your mother has been accused of in the past year:

Former Mets clubhouse attendant and all-around steroid pit boss Kurt Radomski, in an interview on ESPN's Outside the Lines, alleged that he gave former New York Mets pitcher Dwight Gooden steroids, not really surprising considering Gooden was on everything but skates at some point in his career. When ESPN asked him his response to the allegations, Gooden referred all questions to his inner 13-year-old, responding in a text message reading...."LOL".

Good to see Dwight still hasn't lost his youthful exuberance.

Youth Movement

Yet another sign of the apocalypse, ESPN.com reports that the socialist, agenda-wielding group known as the NCAA deemed that 7th graders--thats right, 7th graders--as college prospects. This coming months after the National Association of Basketball Coaches set restrictions on college coaches and their recruiting habits, no doubt focusing on the craddle-robbers of the hardwood.

The real question here is, why? What does a kid who probably spends more time texting that praticing his jumpshot should be available for scouting by coaches two levels above them? Do they want a visit from Chris Hansen? Does it give a school's boosters an opportunity to try out their latest bribery techinques? "I'll trade you two snack-packs for your verbal."

Maybe it was a scare tactic. Some people in the business I have talked to say this was a way to prevent coaches from calling the players. In the report, it is said to be a way of preventing college coaches from working middle-school-aged camps and gaining a recruiting edge over other programs. Hence the drop in the cut-off age from ninth grade to seventh. In that respect, it is a great idea.

But on the other hand, this only presents just one-more challenge that certain college coaches will have to find a loophole for to gain that edge. In this day of 'microwave' expectations, most programs will stop at nothing to find ways around the NCAA and their rules, and it seems to not stop coaches from doing what they can to win and subsequently keep their jobs.

It will be a matter of time to find out whether this curbs recruiting young, but if young players these days are choosing colleges before high schools (see: Boatwright, Ryan) it may just make players work harder to find a way to get to college coaches.

ACCESPN

Something that has really been eating at me, besides Marley and Me's depressing ending, is the fact that the ACC now not only has a grip on Dick Vitale's nuts, but also has a grip on his colleagues, in the form of their diplomas.

So now, not only do I have to be forcefed crappy-to-mediocre basketball played by overrated teams, but when one of them beats the latest 300-or higher rated RPI team, I have to either hear them talk about it during the game, or embellish it after the game.

A short list of the ESPN on-air employees and where they took their kegstands...

Jay Bilas, Jay Williams-Duke
Scott Van Pelt, Len Elmore-Maryland

Suzy Kolber-Miami

Hubert Davis, Stuart Scott, Brad Daughtery-North Carolina

And this doesn't include Duke's Mike Gminski and recently retired Wake Forest's Billy (Fudge) Packer from CBS. So far, thats all I got, if you think of anymore, feel free to comment and let me know so I can add to this arrogance orgy.

Yes, a majority of these people are relegated to college basketball. But as a person who treats the NCAA men's basketball tournament like the first time I saw boobies, this irks me like no other.

What could be the reason for this? Are graduates of the ACC simply better prepared for today's workforce? Are they that talented? Does Dick Vitale do the interviews? It's a conundrum, really.

I just don't see what the problem with hiring a few prime talents from other conferences, the Missouri Valley and Sun Belt Conferences are ripe with talent...and will be...say around December of 2009.

Irrelevant Irrelevance

Also a new feature here on OTB, "Irrelevant Irrelevance". A segment where daily tidbits from sports outlets in television, print, radio or internet that have little to do with a story, are used for filler, or are just idiotic horseshit. Think of it as an Ombudsman Light.

Today's snippet comes from ESPN and the ongoing saga that is current Boston College head football coach Jeff Jagodzinski and his employer telling him that he'll meet the axe if he even interviews for the New Yorks Jets head coaching job in the "This Just In" segment on Sportscenter, Jay Harris reporting:

"This just in, Boston College head coach Jeff Jagodzinski still plans to meet with the New York Jets, despite the threat of being fired."

BREAKING NEWS! Nothing new. Wow, crack reporting by the staffs at the WWL. Next up, Bret Michaels still loves being mauled by skanks.
Coming tomorrow, the takeover that is the ACC on ESPN.

Tebow-kake Consumes College Football

Ok, I can't take it anymore. I've had my fill of all this. My gripe is simple.

Tim Tebow.

The Florida Wunderkind, Gainesville's Golden Boy. Since his first game as a Florida Gator, this kid has been the university's and media's dreamboat. He's beloved by anyone who loves the Blue and Orange and there is good reason for the Tebow cluster-love.

His play is passionate and tough. He says all the right things, makes all the right moves. He's a model citizen, a catholic missionary with his parents. At times I wonder if the dude has ever sneezed. Jesus sits and the right hand of God, I'm pretty sure Tim Tebow sits on the left...check that, Tebow is God.

All these reasons are why I can't stand the dude. Make a mistake, use a curse word, get a P.I. outside a nightclub while nailing the newest UF freshman hotty in the back alley, hell, just talking trash would suffice. DO something that makes you look human.

What makes it worse, it's not really Tebow's fault. Sure he's a smile-for-the-camera, kids eat your vitamins and say your prayers-sayin', seemingly flawless playin', master of media charm and wit, but as members of the media, we all should be able to see through this. Instead, they label him God's gift to college football. Lather him with praise. Hell, even when he's being told by an opposing defender that he would be the fourth-best quarterback in the Big 12, the media-darling with the dark brown spikes said it was a complement. Can this kid even act mad?

So as we enter the final days leading up to the BCS National Title game, I say this. Don't annoint the guy yet. He has done almost everything he can to earn it, but so had a guy named Manning in '97, and he gypped. Hope he has fun being a tight end in the NFL.

I'm back

It took a while, but guess what folks...

New year, new attitude. More tomorrow, coming on the BCS and Tim Tebow.